Good things are coming along

I recently quit my job writing for one of Malaysia's top female magazines. 

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my job. But I love my life more. Writing for a mag is a load of stress and a shit load of fun. I have the best team I've ever had. 

Unfortunately, it pays a rather minimum wage and I have been living paycheck to paycheck - which is something I don't want to continue doing.

Then this new company calls me up and offers me a job and it comes with a pay raise and a higher position. A video interview coupled with a couple of phone calls and emails - I said yes.

Then came the difficult task of telling my editor I want out. 

The first thing she asked me was "Are you unhappy with work?" I told her honestly that I love what I do, but I'm struggling financially and I really don't want to keep on where I am (financially).

I never realized how much I actually loved my job until I walked away from it. Hot tears rolled down my face. My nose was stuffed. My heart actually ached. I cried all the way home.

Then it dawned on me - my new job is in a very busy part of the capital and since the office hours are half an hour earlier, I'll have to get up earlier and join the jam. And even though I get off at 6, the area is so bloody jammed I won't be able to leave anyway. 

That made me even sadder.

The next day I woke up thinking that hey I'm making a change to my life. I should be happier. I should be happier because I won't have to live paycheck to paycheck. I should be happier because I'll be able to exercise more creativity at the new place.

Then I came across this blog post - 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy and I thought wow, how apt. I gave it a read and I am definitely giving up a few things this year because I deserve the happiness.

So from there, I'm going to start off by giving up these few things

1. Self defeating self talk

Shit always happens and I've learnt to always think of the worst case scenario - sometimes it's good but it does get my morale down. I'm going to learn to stop doing that.

2.Complaining

I complain quite a bit. Okay fine, a lot. And come to think about it, what good does it do? So I get to rant a bit but every little bit can help create a mountain and I don't need another mountain in my life.

3.Impress others

The rat race here is where everyone is trying to top one another. I'm competitive but I'm not super competitive. At the end of the day, if you don't like what you see... walk away because I like me!

4. Living your life to other's expectations

In a previous post, I was ranting about how I am never able to be me. I give up a lot to please others around me. I believe this stems from the fact that I lost quite a close family members at a young age and it's gotten me scared. Scared to lose anyone else. So I give in to make people happy so they will have no excuse to leave. Lame I know. But it's a psychological scar. I can't help it. And this will stop.

5. The resistance to change

I'm a creature of comfort. So I'll need to really step out of my comfort zone. While change can never always be for bad or good. I'll need to take my chances.


What about you?