growing old sucks

Yeah you heard me right. Growing old sucks, big time.

I just turned 26 a couple of days ago and I'm telling you... the older you get the more you think. I remember turning 16... gosh was I happy. "Yay, I'm older!!!Yay I'm no longer a kid!!! Yay, I have more responsibilities!!!"

Now, it's "Blehhh, I'm older.... I have more responsibilities.... and more crap to deal with..."

So for CNY, I did spend it with McStupid. We had a nice 24hours together. From 8.30am on the 3rd day of CNY all the way till 8-ish in the morning on the 4th day of CNY. Then... lucky for me, as I was lying in bed watching him sleep at about 6 in the morning, I realized three things.

a) He's not as cute as I remembered him to be.... when I saw him that morning, I had lost the whole 'pounding heart, loss of breath, oh my effing lord he's so bloody cute... zilch. It was just 'Hey, it's McStupid... gee that shirt is red...'

b) He's almost 30... well he's turning 30 next year and he doesn't bloody have any ambition let alone a career. All he wants to do is have fun. I mean, yeah I want to have fun too but I'm not going to just work to have fun. Maybe it's the whole pressure from society - get a job, climb the career ladder, be matured kinda shit. Maybe 8 years ago, I would do it... the whole work just for money so that I can go enjoy life and all. I guess I really am getting old.

c) He's not THE ONE. I thought he was. Or at least I was desperate enough to want to believe that he was. He came at the right timing. I had a new job, I had new friends, I had everything new... and he popped into my life. But I finally learnt that he's not. He's nowhere near being THE ONE.

So as I left (yeah I know this sounds drama-mama) but when I said "Anata, sayonara..." I really felt that I was really saying good bye to him, because at that point, I realized that it doesn't matter to me anymore if I see him again or not. I realized that I've had my fun and that it's over.
He was a season. Can't change that fact that he broke my heart. But I thank him for that. In fact, I thank all broken relationships for broken hearts because it is what's broken which I have mended makes me who I am. The person I am now... has been broken, picked up, dusted off and glued back together. Well, replaced, if not glued :P

Winds have changed. Times have changed. He has changed and so have I. It's over... it's soooo over. Thank god for that!

But heck... it was a shit load of fun while it lasted ;)

how many?

My little nephew Jorge's new phrase these days is "How many?" followed by "1... 2... 4....8!!!" and that's it. He's so adorable and he's such a sweetheart.

Which brings me to my point. How many times more will I be suckered into his sweet nothings? For those who have read my multiply blogs will probably be able to guess who I'm talking about. I met this dude in late April last year... it's February now... 2 months short of one year and I still get suckered into his sweet nothings...

How many times more?

He's very random. He'll text me out of the blue with the usual "I miss you honey," or "hey hey sweetie, watchu up to?" and it goes on for a couple of texts and it'll last a few days and then it's cold turkey.

We've been text flirting since last Saturday non-stop. He told me he'll be back these couple of days and tells me he wants to meet up... he misses me a lot... yadda 3x

Then today he calls me up

"Hun... where are you? Wanna hang out later?"
"You really don't listen to a word I say do you...."
"Huh? What?"
"I already told you I won't be home these couple of days. I'll be back at my grandfather's house for a couple of days,"
"Oh.... when are you coming back then? Oh btw, Gong Hei Fatt Choy,"
"I'll be back in 2 days time and Gong Hei Fatt Choy to you too. When will I be getting me red packet?"
"You? Getting? Aren't we supposed to be giving out them together instead?"
"Hahaha yeah right,"
"Next year... we'll give them out together,"
"Yeah right,"

Convo goes on and on for a bit. He wants me to call him when I reach home and he'll come over to hang with me for 2 days. When I ask "What about your family? Don't you have to spend time with them?" "Well, I wanna hang with you, but if you don't want to then fine... I understand... it's okay," with the sad puppy dog voice over the phone....

I'm telling you... I bow to his every single little command. I'm not surprised that I'll be having mood swings when I get home and when things don't go as "we" plan...