Tuesday, December 2, 2008

I sometimes don't know what to do with him

Again on the topic of being effing pissed. I thought I had let go. Then two random people (random as in not from my usual circle of peeps) tell me about him and that bitch. I know, it's unfair to call her a bitch because she might not know, but I don't effing care.

The randomest thing about it is that both of them, had no idea who I was dating... and I know that they are credible sources in this case.

I'm calling anyone who sleeps in the same bed as my boyfriend a bitch. I have that fucking right.

Anyhoo... random person A tells me that that bitch has a lover in PJ. He could name me the place he lived in and the car he drives - which oh so coincidentally is the same as my boyfriend *fume* then he could tell me that this lover of hers used to be her college mate and they dated for a while...

Random person B asks me about the other Malay girl. And at that time I had no idea what he was talking about and I insisted that there was only one (which is his most recent ex girlfriend) and he insisted that there were two, and one of them was his college mate.

I literally blew my top. Fortunately for him, I didn't blow my top at him. He didn't get to suffer any wrath because
a) I don't like to make a fuss in a relationship
b) By the time we got to talking, I had already had the entire day to cool down...

Had to approach this rationally. Partly because this was from his past. I have things in my past too. But I'm pretty sure I cover my tracks up well, in the sense that it won't jump up and nip him in the arse - like how his is doing to me.

His past is always coming up to nip me in the arse... so many people in the same circle... so many people telling me so many stories... don't get me wrong, it's not that I'm not grateful for the information about the person he is.

But I fell in love with the person I know him as... not the person these people know him as.

I confronted him about it and I told him that it's not fair for me to hear it from others, and that I want to hear it from him. Because him and me is all that matters.

His side of the story
- she's a friend who needed help cuz she's relocated to another country
- they go all the way back to college
- nothing happened
- they used to date

That's when I blew my top at him. I still don't understand.... ex or non ex girlfriend, you NEVER bunk in the same bed with another female if you have a girlfriend! How hard is that to understand? Is that not like a common ground rule? Like "Honey, am I fat?" the automated response is "No, don't be silly," in an assuring voice.

I gave him my two cents worth.

He explained himself. I know where he's coming from. I know what he meant and what he was thinking about when he did that. If he was cheating on me, he wouldn't tell me anything at all, simple as that.

But he didn't know how it would bother me.

So from today forth... she shall be known as the bitch. I don't care how much he dislikes it. Because it's his own fault that he did not clarify it with her and he crossed a boundary.

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